I'm Too Sexy For My Legs

Last night, I went to the local witches' shoppe for their first annual All Hallows Eve party. I was to meet my new friends there, and if the party was as bad as the Friday the 13th Party was, we had plans to leave and go drink a few somewhere downtown.

Thank goodness the party wasn't bad.

Well, it wasn't good, either, but it was MUCH better than the Friday the 13th party. I think partly because Halloween and costumes attract a fun crowd. And partly because there was real food. And of course, then there's the fact that even though, for the most part, many of us didn't know each other, we were able to start conversations simply based on the statement "Hey, your costume is cool; where did you buy..."

This being the first Halloween party I've attended since acknowledging my witchy side, I decided to go as a witch. (Original, eh?) But not just any witch...a Sexy Witch. Of course, this was quite a stretch being as I'm not sexy in the least. (And my cellulite can attest to that, although I'd much rather it stay quiet at times like this.)

I found the coolest skirt at Savers. It is long and black, but the front has two gigantic slits in it, that go almost all the way up to the crotch. Underneath the front slits, there is a tiny mini skirt that just barely covers up the nether region. I built my costume around that skirt, adding a scoop-necked almost Renaissancey-top, a spider choker, a temporary snake wrap-around tattoo on my upper arm, fishnet stockings, high heeled witchy shoes, and a long, curly, purple-colored wig.

I must've done something right, because I won a prize for sexiest costume.

When I got there, my friend Vince was already there. We sat down and talked while I caught him admiring my fishnet covered legs several times. Yeah, I have to admit, they looked good. Nothing quite covers up cellulite like fishnets (and jeans).

By the time Monika and Tom showed up, the party was in full swing. Well, if you count sitting around in a circle talking in twos and threes full swing. Yeah, I didn't say the party was a rager.

Monika looked wonderful, and I am really surprised she didn't win sexiest costume (although for some reason she won spookiest). She had on a fetish latex gown, with a laced up back. The front was low cut, and she accented the gown with a sparkly "diamond" belly belt. She curled her normally straightish hair, wore realistic fangs, and "zombie" contacts. She looked great.

Her husband Tom isn't one to normally dress up, but in his fetish latex pants, red devil top, pointy devil tail, and horns, his effort paid off.

After we talked for awhile, my instructor (who is always the life of the party) got a trivia contest going. It started out with questions about obscure (and not so obscure) witch movies, and moved into mythology of all sorts (from Nordic to Asian to Greek to British). I was only able to answer one question: Who wrote the book "Practical Magic"? (Alice Hoffman) For my correct answer, I received a full-sized candy bar, which Dr. Atkins quickly snatched away from me.

Who invited him to the party?

When the trivia question round had begun to die down, Monika and Tom wanted to leave and go to a real Halloween party. There were several going on in town, and even a free one at Harrah's. But, being the non-clubby type, all I could think of was walking my sexy costumed self into bed.

Oh the exciting life I lead.

Vince walked me to my car (the neighborhood is somewhat dangerous after dark), and told me I looked amazing. Yeah, I think I did look pretty good for a change. Then he told me that if I wanted to catch a movie, I should give him a call.

We hugged, said good-bye, and I high-tailed it out of there for home. Parties are nice, but a warm bed covered in cats is even nicer.