Tuesday, October 10, 2006

Ten Things

Hunky's been chiding me for not updating my blog. "Why didn't you blog about X?" "Why haven't you writing about Z?"

In honor of hunky, here are ten things I apparently should've blogged about, but haven't:

1. The Amazing $9 Offer: Last week, I received a call out of the blue for a job that made me salivate. It was for a Marketing Assistant position, with a 30-hour work week. The woman I spoke to was nice, so I set up an appointment for an interview. I was definitely qualified, and the more I thought about my chances of getting this job, the happier I became.

On interview day, I put on my new interview dress, charged my now magical necklace, and tucked my sigil into my bra. I was set.

When I arrived at the job site (a bit tricky to find, but I got there,with minutes to spare), I was greeted by a festively decorated-for-Halloween office. Besides the decorations, the office was nicely appointed, and I knew this was an atmosphere I would enjoy working at.

That is, until I got the application.

It was a six-page form, asking me everything from salary requirements to permission for them to perform a credit check on me. I had to fill out two pages of personality traits (circling the ones that applied to me, including bad ones, because if at least three "bad" ones weren't circled, I would not be considered a serious applicant). Then I had to write an essay about what my perfect day would be like.

This was not going well.

When I finally sat down with the person I hoped would soon be my boss, she took a look at my application, saw my salary requirements and said "uh oh." She then explained that the position only paid $9 an hour.

Nine. Dollars. An Hour.

For all the skills they required the applicant to have, for the six page survey, covering everything from personality traits to bad habits to a one-page essay, they were only willing to pay $9 an hour. Needless to say, I told her I wasn't interested and left.

And that, my friends, is what looking for a job in Reno is like. Fruitless. And a huge waste of time.

2. Cottage Woes: My realtor called the other day. He said the good news is that he's getting up to 4 calls a day about my property. The bad news: everyone that sees it is scared of it. He suggested that I get some cleaners in there and get the yard fixed up.

And, I have put in MANY calls, with no calls back. Which is why I was getting rid of it in the first place, because I couldn't get a contractor over there to give me an estimate to save my life. My only conclusion is that people in Reno don't really want to work. They say they do, but when you actually give them a call, they decide that they're having much more fun declaring bankruptcy, so they don't call back.

And the frustration just goes on and on and on...

3. The Redefinition of an Eight-Year-Old Relationship: Two weeks ago, hunky and I were getting ready to leave for our counseling appointment. He turned to me and said "What are we going to talk about today? Do we even have anything to talk about?" That led to a discussion that lasted about two hours (we called our counselor to cancel mid-way through our convo). The basic boil down is this: neither one of us is happy with where our relationship is, so we're in the process of "redefining" it, as hunky puts it. This means, we are no longer exclusive.

I was going to move out, but seeing as I don't have a job, and hunky is currently juggling several offers, all of which would take him out of state, he decided it would be easier on both of us if I just stay here. We are best friends, and he figures we'll make it work somehow. In the meantime, I'll be here to take care of the dogs if he should leave suddenly, and he'll continue to provide me with a roof over my head until I can either 1) afford to move out or 2) get a job, which kind of seem the same to me, but what the hell...

4: I'm Gonna Be A Star: Actually, I'm not going to be a star, but I did have my chance, which I declined. Scraps, the local barkery, asked hunky and me if we wanted to be a part of their advertising campaign (along with the dogs, of course). The answer was yes, with the exception of me. I am scared of the camera (or rather, what I look like on camera), so I just went along to help manage the dogs during the part of the photo shoot that focused on hunky with a single dog, rather than the whole pack. So, if you're a local, look for Todd and the dogs in a print ad near you soon.

5: Wrestling With My Weight: It happened again. My metabolism decided that it will no longer respond to Atkins, so it slowed down and grabbed a few extra pounds, which it meted out between my thighs and my buttocks. I heard that for every decade after 30, the body's metabolism slows down by 10%. That would put my metabolism as about 25% slower than it was in my 20's.

It's so frustrating and aggravating for me. I watch what I eat. I count my carbs. I exercise. I do almost everything right (with the occasional monthly splurge when I go visit my parents, because they refuse to understand that when I say "no sweets, no carbs," that I really mean it). But no matter what I do, it only results in a momentary weight loss, until my metabolism realizes "Hey, she's trying to fool me again," and slows down again in defiance.

It's gotten to the point where I almost just want to give up and become a fattie. I am almost ready to buy a closetful of pull-on pants and muumuus and call it a day. I mean, I'm not enjoying much of my food now, and I'm still gaining weight. So why not enjoy it while gaining weight?

I don't know...forty-something seems a little early to be giving up, so I'm still hanging in there, bumping up my exercise and bumping down my carbs. But I tell you what, another year or two of getting nowhere with my metabolism will probably find me at the nearest Lane Bryant, that is, after I have a gigantic Cinnabon in the Food Court.

6. Finally, some friends: I think I've whined in here before about how difficult it's been for me to make friends in Reno. Every time I make a friend I start to get close to, that person moves away (Reno is a very transient area). However, through the local Witches Meetup group, I finally made a few good friends, and we've been hanging out frequently, doing things like outings to the Ren Faire, building an origami haunted palace for Halloween, and eating lunch at Claim Jumper. I am officially part of a group, and it feels good.

7. Fighting With Office Team: Yesterday, I received a call from Office Team. I had applied to a job they're trying to fill, and they decided I did indeed make a good candidate. So, they asked that I come in today to be tested. The recruiter asked me to bring in two forms of identification, and two names and phone numbers of supervisors, one of which had to be from my most current place of employment. I told them that I would be glad to bring in two names with accompanying phone numbers, but neither would be from Acme Consulting Company.

The guy I spoke to insisted, and I stood my ground, and said no, I would not provide that information. He said I need not be worried; as long as I hadn't done anything unethical, Acme couldn't give me a bad reference. I finally said that was exactly what I was afraid of, as Acme and I had a clash of what was and wasn't ethical. So, he finally relented and said I could use Westaff instead.

So, even though this particular job I applied for initially had me excited, I'm dreading this encounter today at Office Team. It seems like it might just be a replay of item #2 above...

8. I'll Put A Spell On You: Believe it or not, my Risting Tradition classes are almost over. My instructor told us that we only have five classes left. We end in January, at which time he'll let us know which ones of us he will initiate, and which ones of us won't have that honor.

Last week, I had a one-on-one class with my instructor, and he tested me on some theory, etc. Then he said something that I took for face value, and only later realized it could've had a hidden meaning. He said that no one in his Monday class was going to graduate, let alone be initiated, if they kept doing what they're doing. However, everyone in his Tuesday class (the class I'm a member of), was going to graduate. Then he said "But, not everyone will be invited to be initiated."

After class as I was driving home, it occurred to me that this might be a veiled warning to me that I might not be invited to be initiated. My instructor isn't always upfront, and sometimes uses hints to get his point across. The only way I have of finding out is to ask him directly. And, honestly, I'm not sure that I care enough at this point to do that...

9. Snilly Wills: Purrscilla (a.k.a. Purrsnickety, Purrsnilla, Snills, Snilly, Snilly Willy, and Snilly Wills) is recovering nicely from her surgery. She's still not peeing in large amounts, which bugs me. The vet, though, said as long as she's peeing, he's happy. Yesterday,the veterinary office called to let me know what type of crystal she had, and the type of diet to put her on to help counteract crystal formation.

A holistic vet in the area said he can help correct her system with a regimen of Chinese herbs and acupuncture. While I'm interested, he has very limited hours, which means as soon as I start working, I won't be able to take her anymore. So, I'm still mulling that around. In the meantime, I'll be getting her new food and continue to watch her pee. She thinks I'm a perv, but I keep trying to assure her I only have her best interests at heart...

10. Benny, The Well Hung Chihuahua: Benny is our youngest and smallest canine, yet the size of his doghood is HUGE. Unfortunately for him, it's often hidden from view by his big, blue diaper. However, on the few occasions we set him free, he celebrates by rubbing his gigantic schween on hunky, and then French kissing him. Todd keeps telling Benny that boys don't kiss boys, to which Benny replies "I can't quit you."

1 comment:

Jedi said...

Oh PJ, you do make me smile. Please, please, don't give in to Cinnabon. If only for what it can do to your ticker. There are certain phrases that have mad me snort with laughter. I know not attractive lol but "Benny, The Well Hung Chihuahua" made it for me. Nowhere this morning did it make it known that I would be reading that today ;)

Take care of yourself hun

Rx