Cloudy Day

Today's Tarot:
The Sun Reversed
The Sun Reversed Clouds may be obscuring truth. Not as bright as things could be, but not dark either. A mitigating of circumstances. Possible sadness. Burn out from a job or relationship. Time to sit this one out until bright sun returns. Positive energies dampened, but not completely gone. Focus on good still at hand until time passes. Confusion and concealment. Truth is still there, but may be hidden.

***

Yesterday was a horrible day at work. It should have been a good day - it was my first early day, my first chance to get off at 4 p.m. I knew I only had one thing on my plate - a request that I should have come in to find in the status of "Pending Closure." Instead, I found a note from the auditor - the whole request had been done incorrectly, and the ensuing steps to correct it took all day - and most of the night.

The problem? The first validator didn't quite know what to look for, and therefore okayed the import template. Once the data was imported, it of course generated incorrect data. To the untrained eye, the data looked correct. However, to the more experienced auditor, it was wrong and had to be redone.

And of course, these things never go smoothly. The tools wouldn't work. Canceling the parts became a nightmare as the import tools kept generating errors. I ended up crying out of frustration - thankfully not at my desk and not in the bathroom - I was lucky enough to find an empty office, closed the door, and stayed in there until I could compose myself.

In the light of a new day, I hate myself a little for getting that frustrated. But I did, and now I just need to move on.

The day was probably a little more tension filled than normal anyway because another new person on my team was let go. I have a feeling it wasn't due to performance - he kept taking days off to go to other interviews. Still, it's always unnerving to have someone fired, especially on a day when nothing is going right and I couldn't look at myself and say, "At least my performance is good." Yesterday, it wasn't.

Again, I know the fault wasn't entirely mine. The import never should have passed validation in the first place. But it did, and the time it took to fix the request meant it wasn't finished on time, which will cause another slight in metrics.

I'll take my cue from the card: the sun is gone for now, but it'll be back. I'll hold on the the promise that positive energies are not completely gone and wait for the clouds to part. Until then, I may just need to be patient and realize that not every day can be a winner.